Some people go through life with a little angel and a little devil on their shoulders who guide them through all their various ethical and moral dilemmas. These tiny cherubs whisper in their subject’s ears why their way is right and lead them to the choices that will stay with them for the rest of their lives and may have far-reaching implications that could affect many, many people all over the world.

I think we can all agree that those people are losers who do not have their priorities in place.  If you are reading this column, chances are you are either related to me or the biggest ethical dilemma you face is what to Sharpie on your passed-out friend’s head after a twelve-hour Sunday binge of football and American beer.  And, like me, your little angels and little devils really only care about the game.  For example, my shoulder angel is a Bucs optimist.  He wears a brand new white Cadillac Williams jersey, is hopeful right up through the last second and is always looking for the bright spots of the game.  And he’s always smiling.  Sometimes I just want to slap him.  Conversely, my shoulder devil is a Bucs pessimist.  He wears a tattered, orange Bill Capece jersey which he hasn’t taken off since 1983 and is really starting to reek.  He’s still got that air of smugness about him after accurately predicting embarassing seasons for 14 years and has really been cranking up the insolence this year since the 0-4 start.  Kind of like a cross between David Spade and Gilbert Godfried, except taller and more unbearable.  The three of us watched the Bucs beat the Eagles yesterday, and I thought I’d share a little of the conversation we had after the game with you.

Bucs Optimist: 62 yards!!  What a kick!  What a finish!  What a—OUCH!
Bucs Pessimist: What?
BO: I hit my hand on the ceiling fan jumping up and down.
BP: Figures.  I wouldn’t get too excited, though.  The Bucs had no business winning this game.
BO: A win is a win.  Everyone says they’ll take an ugly win over a pretty loss any day.
BP: Teams that say that are usually good teams that squeak out a close one against an equally good team.  The Bucs are a bad team who backed into a victory after the clearly superior Eagles couldn’t get out of the way of their own mistakes.
BO: Good defenses force mistakes.  They force interceptions, fumbles and punts.  They scare the opposing quarterback into tossing his cheesesteak all over the Ray Jay field.  The Bucs defense ruled this game.
BP: Good defenses don’t allow 500+ yards.  Good defenses don’t allow an obviously tired quarterback to rush for 76 yards.
BO: They made plays when it counted.
BP: Tell that to Derrick Brooks‘s jock.  Brian Westbrook left it on the field for him.
BO: You’re so crude.  Scott, can’t you do anything about him?
Me: He’s kind of right, though.  The secondary was fine, but the linebackers missed key tackles and never got to McNabb when they blitzed.  The defensive line couldn’t contain McNabb when he scrambled and then the linebackers missed the tackle.  They played better than they have been, but 500 yards is 500 yards.
BP: See?
BO: All I know is that the Eagles first eight possessions ended like this: fumble, punt, INT, INT, punt, punt, end of half, INT.
BP: And the last three?
BO: Shut up.
BP: Hey, the defense might be able to get away with allowing all those yards if the offense can score some points.
BO: Bruce Gradkowski is still a rookie and is still figuring things out.  I’d say 2-1 as a starter with only one interception in three games is pretty good.  The points will come.
BP: How?  The kid has no deep ball so he has to depend on dump offs to bail him out.  The linebackers know this and are waiting for it.  Eight yards per catch… it’s abysmal.  The team will be resigned to kicking field goals and trying to win games 9-3.
Me: Winning 9-3 is still winning.  Plenty of championship teams have had mediocre offenses, including the 2002 Bucs.
BO: What Gradkowski’s missing in the deep ball he makes up for in mobility.  He’s getting first downs all over the place because he can scramble.
BP: Maybe he has to scramble because he’s scared to throw.
BO: Now you’re just reaching.  Here’s the thing: On that last drive to set up the record-setting field goal, Bruce scrambled for nine yards and then on the next play tossed the ball out of bounds to kill the clock when he saw he couldn’t complete a pass.  You just know Chris Simms would have taken a sack or thrown a pick in either of those situations.  In the past, most people might have expected the Bucs to lose under those conditions.  But the Bucs have found ways to beat top-notch teams from both conferences in back-to-back games.  Good teams find ways to win.
BP: You can’t be crazy enough to think they have a shot at the playoffs.
BO: Who knows?  The Bucs are three games out of the lead for the NFC South with ten games to go.  Despite Atlanta’s good showing yesterday, I don’t see them as a playoff team.  Carolina just lost to the team the Bucs beat last week. The Saints’ schedule doesn’t get any easier, either.  It’s too early to count the Bucs out.  Anything is possible.
BP: Don’t you ever get tired of being so chipper?
BO: Don’t you ever get tired of smelling like a dead wombat?
BP: Touché.

So, that’s kind of where I am with this team.  I really want to be optimistic about the victories and the team’s ability to pull out a victory when they really had to right to expect it.  But I just can’t see a team winning consistently like this.  Changes still need to be made, and I hope temporary miracle finishes don’t prolong the status quo any longer than necessary.