GAINESVILLE – I spent much of Monday trying to find out if University of Florida president Bernie Machen had joined Georgia president Michael Adams in asking CBS to stop referring to the Florida-Georgia football game as the “World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.”

After several calls to my favorite PR guy – Tampa-Trib-reporter-turned-UF-flack Steve Orlando – I received this statement from Machen in my e-mail box.

“We are committed to the issues of curbing binge drinking and underage drinking among our students. UF has a broad range of actions it is taking to address these issues.”

If you think that sounds like a whole lot of nothing, you’d be correct.

So why didn’t Machen just say that he and athletic director Jeremy Foley had sent a letter to SEC commissioner Mike Slive last November asking Slive to put pressure on the SEC’s broadcast partners – CBS, ESPN and Jefferson-Pilot Sports – to stop using the phrase? I don’t know. Machen didn’t return any phone calls, hence the statement. But I have a guess.

Machen’s quest to curb binge drinking on Florida’s campus has cast him as a Dean Wormer for the new millennium. Liquor-loving students have lampooned him, and alumni have worried he might send someone to confiscate their pre-game beverages (he won’t).

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The former pediatric dentist is no dummy. While president at Utah, he learned people in that state like their guns. Since coming to Florida, he’s learned people in the Sunshine State love their booze. Machen probably knew that if the contents of that letter came to light, he’d be further vilified by those who think he’s spitting on tradition in the name of political correctness.

If you think this is the part of the Blogtacular in which I rip Machen for being a square, you’re wrong. He is the CEO of what is essentially a government-funded multibillion-dollar corporation, and in today’s lawsuit-happy society, he needs to take every possible step to ensure his university does not implicitly endorse chugging alcohol until the world starts spinning. It’s Machen’s job to say “Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.”

That said, the prez should own up to his actions, however unpopular they may be. The people who write the big checks – and if you haven’t been paying attention, these are the only people whose opinions usually matter – understand his motives.

Besides, the “Cocktail Party” nickname isn’t going anywhere. The schools and the city of Jacksonville distanced themselves from the name in 1985, yet the phrase has survived. As long as there are Gator chomps, silver britches, Budweiser and hibachi grills, the weekend nearest Halloween will always be the World’s Largest Cocktail Party.