What’s next? A Scourging At the Pillar paperweight?

It was probably only a matter of time, especially after the success of those What Would Jesus Do? rubber band bracelets twhich were all the rage and probably still are among the Bible Thumper set that wearing one’s faith on one’s sleeve, or perhaps one’s wrist would eventually go upscale.

This just in - and just in time for Father’s Day, too! - for that extra special disciple in your life, the Florida Family Policy Council has discovered its inner Home Shopping Network.

If you act now, for just a lousy, stinking $49.95, you too can own the Florida Family Policy Council Ten Commandment bracelet.

But wait! There’s more!

Each stainless steel and 18-karat gold bracelet comes complete with ten links, each one representing one of the venerable Ten Commandments.

But wait! There’s more!

In addition to the Ten Commandments, each bracelet also features 10 replicas of the Torah scroll.

But wait! There’s more!

The Florida Family Policy Council bracelet is endorsed by none other than the organization’s grand pooh-bah, John Stemberger with this ringing compliment: “For most of my life I have never worn any jewelry other than a wedding ring or a watch. But I really love my Ten Commandment Bracelet and wear it all the time.”

But wait! There’s more!

Act now and we’ll throw in, as an extra added bonus, your own personal matching Gays and Lesbians Burning In Hell earrings.

Or, if you prefer, perhaps you migh tlike to be the first in your prayer group to sport a snazzy crucifix cellphone, which makes speaking in tongues even more fun for the whole family.

But wait! There’s more!

In addition to the Ten Commandment’s bracelet, for but a mere $250 more we’ll throw in our custom-made Popeil Pocket Exorcism Kit.

“When I’m possessed by Satan, nothing gets the devil out of my hair faster than a Popeil Pocket Exorcism Kit,” said John Stemberger.

And that’s the God’s honest truth.