Worst Mother of the Year

Posted May 7, 2009 by Donna Koehn

Updated May 8, 2009 at 09:01 AM

Yes, Sunday is Mother’s Day, and we can all look forward to having breakfast in bed, chores done without nagging, a day at the spa. Of course I’m kidding.

The Asylum Web site has an online poll asking readers to choose the worst mother of 2009. And who among us doesn’t enjoy a little schadenfreude from time to time?

(Please note that Asylum is not for the kiddies.)

And so, as our Mother’s Day gift to you, here are some mothers who make us look good:

Octomom, of course.

Hooker Mom: Prostitution is tough job for a mom, but police say Catherine Thomas of Bucks County, Penn., figured out a way to juggle being a parent and being a hooker by locking her 7-year-old son in the motel room bathroom while she turned tricks. An undercover cop put an end to this arrangement, and the child and three family dogs were taken away.

Shoplifting Mom: On the one hand, 37-year-old Callie Rough is an awful mother for allegedly shoplifting a book right in front of her two children. On the other hand the book was titled “101 Ways to Be a Great Mom,” so at least Callie accepts that there is room for improvement.

Sex Orgy Mom: While it is true that Lynn Long didn’t have sexual contact with any of her ninth-grade son’s sleepover guests, the same cannot be said of Long’s 38-year old friend and fellow mom Angela Honeycutt. According to police, Long had asked the other mother to chaperone the party, and found her showering with two of the teenage boys.

Drunk Breast-Feeding Mom: Connecticut mother Allanah Early was arrested for breast-feeding her 3-week-old smack in the middle of a seven-drink binge at a local watering hole. (Although that’s nothing compared to the Web site’s 2007 Worst Mom of the Year Wendy Cook, who was busted for snorting lines of cocaine off the stomach of her 2-month-old son while breast-feeding.)

“I’ll Stop This Car Right Now” Mom: Madlyn Primoff, 45, made good on this famous threat when her two daughters wouldn’t quit their bickering. She surprised the tweens by tossing them from her car and demanding they walk home three miles. While the 12-year-old was able to run down Primoff as she drove away, her 10-year old wasn’t so lucky. A Good Samaritan found the girl wandering aimlessly in a neighboring business district.

And now don’t we all feel better about our parenting skills?