Weekend Tweats [The Tastiest, Briefest Words About Food In 140 Characters Or Less]
Posted August 05, 2012 at 10:14 AM
The funniest food-related things I saw this week?
Both came in t-shirt form.
The first was witnessed yesterday when I stopped at a food truck on Hillsborough Avenue.
I hadn’t seen the Smokehouse Grille before, but the traffic-cone-orange color and the “Gilligan’s Island” font on the signage caught my eye.
That and the inversely printed Coke cup.
HELLO? PHOTOSHOP DISASTERS?
Anyway, there was a huge, very pork-centric menu from which to choose:
Boiled peanuts, smoked mullet and devil crab?
Oh, right, the funny part. I’m getting to it.
I went to order, choosing a rib sammich and getting a sausage and peppers for my Official Offspring of The Stew.
The gentleman owner of this establishment says, “We have tilapia.”
Okay, I say. My poker face shows that I’m not willing to jump off the fish-by-the-side-of-the-road high dive just yet.
“It’s a whole tilapia.”
“It’s from the ocean, not the freezer.”
I politely passed.
Then I noticed this good gentleman’s shirt. And I almost reconsidered, because, hey, if you can pull off a self-tailored shirt that reads, “HOW MAY I IGNORE YOU TODAY?” then you deserve a tilapia sale.
Second funniest thing came at The Swap Shop, also on Hillsborough Avenue, also yesterday.
Not long after walking into the flea market, I saw a table selling pigeons, parakeets, bunnies and roosters.
It was exactly what you are now thinking in your mind.
This wasn’t a pet table. This was a dinner table dressed as a pet table.
The best part of it was this shirt:
It reads, and I quote, “I’M NOT AS GOOD AS I ONCE WAS, BUT I’M AS GOOD ONCE AS I EVER WAS.”
Thank you, Toby Keith. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Okay, time for the week’s best food tweets. Try not to spit up your coffee: