Jeff Houck

The Tampa Tribune’s food writer since 2005, Jeff Houck covers the way people live through their food. He also hosts the Table Conversations food podcast and believes that everything crunchy is good.

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Homer Simpson, Please Pick Up The White Chocolate Courtesy Phone

Posted Oct 2, 2006 by Jeff Houck

Updated Oct 2, 2006 at 08:40 AM

So, I was tooling around the megachain superstore yesterday.

Am I the only one who sees the problem with this product?

Not only do you have to not use any energy to brush your teeth with an electric toothbrush, you have to include molded plastic representations of the reason you’re actually brushing? Did Ben and Jerry’s have some sort of cooperative crossover going on this product? When did brushing your teeth become some sort of recreational activity?

Then I tool over to the shampoo aisle and find this:

I’ll go on record as being very much pro food-themed products, especially back in the 70s, when beer shampoo was the rage. Wisely, no one attempted a beer mouthwash. (Actually, they did. They just called it Coors.)

But I don’t want my hair smelling like some tropical breakfast beverage. I’d feel like someone was about to jam a little pink umbrella in my head and suck out my brain with a straw or something.