[11:30 a.m.] So far on my journey down Florida’s west coast, I’ve been just about the only goober with cameras. But today in Naples, it appears I have hit the epicenter of the Hurricane Wilma action—well, at least in terms of how many TV trucks and cameras are here. Thing is, it’s partly sunny here on this Sunday morning and the beach is bustling with swimmers, sunbathers, surfers, skim boarders and, of course, THE MEDIA. I figure the ratio between beachgoers and media is about 5 to 1, which is better than the plastic surgeon-patient ratio of Beverly Hills. Gee wiz, who isn’t here? PBS? Telemundo? Discovery Channel?

I’ve also seen my first sign of fellow Media General journalists—the News Channel 8 team satellite truck! I’ve been waiting for this little eventuality, the point where we cross paths. To me, this means I need to sprint in the opposite direction. But before I go, I gotta make sure to let the air of their tires so they can’t follow me. This is like being at the Olympics and seeing one of your paper’s writers at the same event. The Olympics are so big with so many good stories, no two journalists from the same company should ever be in the same place at the same time.

I came down to the pier half hoping to see Florida State grad Stephanie Abrams, now a star at the Weather Channel. To me, that would mean I’m in the bowels of the storm coverage if I could just touch the hem of her Weather Channel-issued garment. She’s been broadcasting the last three days from the pier in Naples but when I got here, no Stephanie, no cameras, no lights, so sound guy, no makeup artist. What gives? Is she doing this like Rob Corddry of the Daily Show, where he pretends to be reporting from the White House or a mosque in Baghdad when he’s really just standing in front of a rear-screen projection in a New York studio? Believe me, I won’t rest until I get to the bottom of this important story. I could be on to some big cover-up here.

[12:15 p.m.] I just met a guy who went by the name of Ryan Pereira, who, when asked where he was from, made it sound like he didn’t live in any one place. CIA? Maybe. Actually, he once lived here in Naples—for nine years. He calls Miami his home base now but he still remembers a hurricane that threatened Naples after he had just moved here. He said the media made a big deal of the storm during the build-up coverage, then the storm weakened and all Naples got was some rain. Seeing how many media types are here, it’s easy to see why people would get worked up, rush out and stock up on non-perishables like canned food and Twinkies (seriously, have you ever eaten a stale Twinkie? No. That’s because they have so many preservatives and Polysorbate 80 in them they could last through several hurricane seasons).

[1 p.m.] Oddly enough, the surf doesn’t seem as good today as yesterday. The swells are not as consistent and they’re not as clean here at Naples’ pier. That may have something to do with the shoreline here compared to that of Wiggins Pass, just up the road. I couldn’t get over how many girls were surfing. Most were on the easier-to-ride longboards but I did meet one Naples girl on a short board who was a pretty darn good surfer. She once went to school at Flagler College in St. Augustine, where my surfing sister lives. She said she had to miss yesterday’s better waves because of work. She said she didn’t even allow herself to drive down to the beach and look at the waves because she knew she would get in the water. Bummer. Good waves here only come once every hurricane, which lately seems like every other week of the summer and fall in Florida.

[1:45 p.m.] Most of the businesses are boarded up, but I still see people with plywood in their trucks TODAY. Where’d the get plywood 24 hours before the storm’s scheduled arrival and why are they waiting until now to do this? The Home Depot I saw here still had some plywood piled up and there was no lines. I can remember last summer in Tampa, when hurricanes were seemingly everywhere on the west coast. They had to put security guards by the front door to monitor the lines in case it got violent over plywood. Not in Naples. People here seem to be a little more mellow. And from the looks of the homes along the beach, they can afford to be mellow—and have someone install their plywood for them. There are some grand old Florida homes here, mixed in with some McMansions. But for the most part, it’s pretty tasteful. It reminds me a bit of Pass--A-Grille on St. Pete Beach, only bigger and more expensive. And just like Pass-A-Grille, it would all be washed away if it took a hit from a serious hurricane. Everything here seems so low and so close to the water. Even downtown Naples is only about a mile from the nearest beach.

[2:10 p.m.] The city of Naples did something crazy here: they passed sign ordinances. Unlike Tampa’s 15-mile long eyesore, Dale Mabry, you can’t have business signs the size of Mount Rushmore along U.S. 41. From an esthetics point of view, that’s a great thing. But it also makes it hard to find anything, too because nearly every building on this road looks as if it came out of the same mold, all topped with mission-style tiles and all landscaped with the same hedges and lawns. It’s kinda creepy. Maybe one huge ugly road through your city is the better alternative. Of course, Tampa has more than one, if you count Fowler, Hillsborough, MLK, Bruce B. Downs…

Ok, gotta go file some photos for you from all this non-hurricane action...You Stay Classy, Naples.