You Write The Caption

Posted Jan 25, 2007 by Janine Dorsey

Updated Jan 25, 2007 at 12:42 PM

“Look at us with our perfect lawn, perfect car and perfect life, Bob!”

“Yes, dear.”

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Self Validation Not Worth Loving A Loser

Posted Jan 25, 2007 by Kevin Walker

Updated Jan 25, 2007 at 11:06 AM

In Better Single Than Sorry, author Jen Schefft uses humor and some common sense to help women come to the realization that wanting a man in your life is not worth settling. Being alone is far better than being with a loser, or someone’s whose needs you have to cater to constantly, or someone who can only talk about football. And so on. As the book flap says: “Does being alone mean you’re doomed to be miserable forever? Definitely not!” Consider this book therapy for a “relationship obsessed” society.

On the fiction front, Alex Espinoza - a Mexican native now living in Southern California - has released his first novel, Still Water Saints, which follows the fortunes of the a small, mostly Latino town on the outskirts of Los Angeles called Agua Mansa. Kirkus Review calls the novel “a well-crafted collection of vignettes, neatly stitched together.”

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American Idol—- 01.24.07

Posted Jan 25, 2007 by Chris Kuhn

Updated Jan 25, 2007 at 07:45 AM

We’re back on the road looking for talent in this season of American Idol (Wednesdays/FOX) and this time, we’re headed to New York City. There’s never been a winner from NYC. Will we meet the next big superstar today? This time, successful songwriter Carole Bayer-Sager joins the judges to tear apart – er, critique the performers. I expect her to be really dull and useless but she surprises me. I appreciate her honest yet carefully worded criticism and her enthusiasm and conviction when a young talent comes along. I’m surprised. I really like her.

The Big Apple offers some big freaks. Let’s meet some of the most memorable:

Ian - He auditioned on So You Think You Can Dance and is a self-proclaimed superstar. He’s been rejected before, and once we hear two notes, we know he’ll be rejected again.

Fania – She’s from both Athens, Greece and New Jersey (I’m not quite sure how that works). She says she’s a dancer (do applicants keep forgetting that this song is about singing?) but her strange moves bewilder the judges. And her singing is appalling. Op-a and out-ta here!

Ashanti – She’s tried out for American Idol several times and even made it to Hollywood twice. But today she just doesn’t have it. And she cannot believe they’re passing on her. She goes into a length, melodramatic soliloquy about what this opportunity means to her – completely omitting the fact that she’s already gotten two big breaks. Get a life and move on!

Clifton – He loves to be the center of attention, play the harmonica and make strange robot sounds. But when he belts out ZZ Top’s Tush – it’s hilarious, particularly with the bizarre foot-stomping to accompany it. Nope, he’s headed back to Delaware.

Nakia – she’s so bubbly, she’s annoying. (Does this girl ever stop singing?) She whoops it up with Dancin’ in the Streets and the judges are loving it. But as soon as she’s asked to slow it down, the judges get lost in her pitch problems. And crazy girl leaves in a heap of tears from the string of NOs.

Sarah (the bad) – She admits she’s completely tone-deaf and that she entered the singing competition so she could be the first American Idol who had never sung before. And they could teach her how to sing, too – wouldn’t that be great?  (Huh?! Are these people insane?)

Antonio – He looks over 50 and does his own quirky, condensioned version of New York, New York (“New Yor, New Yor”).

Christopher – He looks like Simon Cowell but sounds completely like a girl. It’s eerie and I’m getting the creeps just listening to it. Simon suggests he sing it in a dress and stilettos, leading to this year’s first childish fight between Paula and Simon. Ew, please send him home.

And finally, the strangest one of them all:
Isadora – she says she’s a clairvoyant, palm reader and the next American Idol. She’s a strange one ,who describes her music as a blend of Pat Benatar, Stevie Nicks, Janis Joplin and Led Zeppelin. She does a clog-stomping, moaning and groaning version of Lady Marmalade. Well, there aren’t any actual words in her version until she breaks out into Janis Joplin. The judges are bewildered. She’s sent back to her crystal ball.

And a multitude of off-key men in blue hair, space suits and strange androgenous haircuts enter the audition room during the New York visit, only to be ousted soon after.

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But New York City does provide us the chance to meet a few singers worth our time:

Sarah (the good)- Mom and Dad don’t know she’s auditioning. You see, she told them she was staying at a friend’s house overnight but instead she left Ohio and somehow got herself to New York City to try out for Idol. The judges are touched, poor Sarah is crying as she shares her story – heck, I’m tearing up myself – and while she doesn’t have the strongest voice in the world, she’s got serious potential. She makes it through to Hollywood and nervously calls Dad to tell him the good news with Ryan Seacrest by her side. It’s one of the most touching moments I have ever seen on this show before.

Amanda – she and her best friend Antonella are just sure they would sell lots of albums together and they really think the show should pick two Idols this year. The judges ask her best friend to join them in the audition room. But when they duet together, it’s really rough. So they audition separately. Amanda just scrapes by and gets a ticket to Hollywood.

Antonella – the best friend steps up for her shot. And though her friend Amanda is the classically trained one, she actually has a fresher, more contemporary sound. The judges love her look and sound, and there’s no scraping by for this lady. She sails through to the next round. But she’s a good enough friend to keep the judges’ comments that she was the better of the two to herself.

Kia – She shares her take on Aretha Franklin and receives the exciting news that she’s the best the judges have seen all day. I think she’s good but she doesn’t knock me out. Uh-oh…is this going to be another one of those years where the judges pick a favorite that I just don’t get? Yikes. It might be Ruben season all over again.

Jenry – He’s only 16 but he looks like he’s at least 21. His booming voice and good looks make for really good Idol material. Not surprisingly, he skates to the next round.

Jory – She’s met the Queen of England and prime ministers and she figures if she can take on the Queen, she can handle Simon. She tackles an ambitious piece requiring quite a range and nails it. The judges love her. I think we’ll have a chance to vote for this young lady down the road.

Porcelana - She’s been training for this audition like a boxer. Her abs are impressive but her singing is a little absurd. She’s rough around the edges, but she’s definitely different than the rest. Three say yes but guess who says no? Yep, Simon just doesn’t get her and I have to admit – I see his point a little on this one. But I appreciate her unique style and she may have some potential if she can just get over herself and her tight muscles and focus on the voice more.

Rachel – She studies opera in school but when she does contemporary music, it’s a little uneven. But like Porcelana, she might be just different enough to get noticed and be popular with the public if she gets that far. For now, she’s off to Hollywood.

Chris – Paula and Randy say he reminds them of Justin Timberlake, as he tackles the song that helped last season’s Elliott (my favorite!) gain popularity, Song for You by Leon Russell/Donnie Hathaway. Simon thinks the kid can do better in the next round, but he agrees he’s got that special something and they put him through.

Nick – He made it to Hollywood last season but he dropped out when he couldn’t get the lyrics to their group song. This time, he chooses Fly Me to the Moon but I’m not that affected by his performance. Yet all four judges give him a solid yes. I guess he’s lucky I’m not sitting behind the judges’ table.

New York City was just plain weird. But 35 people earned a spot in Hollywood. Next week, we’re off to Birmingham, Alabama, hometown of Idol winners Ruben Studdard and Taylor Hicks and Idol runner-up Bo Bice. It looks like another batch of fools without talent amid a few people who can sing – what’s new – so it ought to make for some entertaining TV.

What did you think of tonight’s episode? Did you find any new favorites that you’ll be personally rooting for? I really liked Jenry and I think Sarah, the lying daughter who ran away to audition will be a fun story to run – if she can just get past the next stage of competition. I still think Memphis gave us some better singers but then again, we only saw a handful of the 35 who made it through here. Who knows which potential superstars we didn’t get to see?

Don’t forget to check out our American Idol Forum to share your thoughts on the show so far this season. We’ve already begun to get into some lively discussion and you’re invited to join in the chat. Just click here to see for yourself! Until our next bit of Idol talk…

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Say Hello To This Little Blogpost

Posted Jan 24, 2007 by Mike Samuels

Updated Jan 24, 2007 at 03:19 PM

Ahoy Mates! M’name is Michael Samuels and you can consider me Capt. Gasparilla on Saturday.

I’ll be embedded with the Krewe of Hillsborough all day long, starting at 9 a.m. where I’ll meet them for Bloody Mary’s and Krispy Kremes.

I’ll be with them the rest of the day, from the police-escorted bus ride to the staging area to riding on their float.

Beth White, krewe president, guaranteed me it’s a good time.

“We have so much fun,” she said. “Everybody is so excited to be there. We drink. We mingle. It is definitely a party fest.”

Expect as many updates as I can provide of the behind the scenes sites and sounds live from Gasparilla 2007.

It’s almost here my friends. Can you feel the excitement?

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Ex-Idol Star to Comment for TV Guide Channel

Posted Jan 24, 2007 by Walt Belcher

Updated Jan 24, 2007 at 01:44 PM

  TV Guide Channel announced today (Jan. 24) that Justin Guarini, the first runner-up on “America Idol,” will join season three finalist Kimberly Caldwell and “Popstars” winner Rosanna Tavarez on the “Idol Tonight” show in March.

  Does anyone remember “Popstars”?

  Poor Guarini. I wonder if Kelly Clarkson ever sends him a Christmas card?

  “Idol Tonight” is a live show that be on Wednesday nights beginning in March on TV Guide Channel. It awill air just before “American Idol” on Fox.

  Guarini, Caldwell and Tavarez will be correspondents. 

  The show will begin when “Idol” narrows the field of contestants to the final 24. “Idol Tonight” will feature interviews with former “Idol” finalists, industry insiders, fashion stylists, vocal coaches and more.

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