John Allman

If you’ve ever wandered the aisles at the video store or surfed the DVR pay-per-view options and seen a bunch of movies that you’ve never heard of, chances are John has watched them. Why? He loves movies. All kinds of movies. Good, bad, so-bad-they’re good, even the truly unwatchable ones. He mostly loves horror and science-fiction and drive-in exploitation movies that most upstanding model citizens wouldn’t dare watch. Then he writes up his thoughts so you can decide - watch, don’t watch or avoid at all costs. Sometimes he even gets to talk to the cool folks who make some of your favorite films.

 Blood, Violence and Babes
 John Allman

Most Recent Entries

• New Releases for Tuesday, Feb. 7, 2012
• New Releases for Tuesday, Jan. 31, 2012
• New Releases for Tuesday, Jan. 24, 2012
• A Conversation With: Adrián García Bogliano
• New Releases for Tuesday, Jan. 17, 2012
• New Releases for Tuesday, Jan. 10, 2012
• New Releases for Tuesday, Jan. 3, 2012
• New Releases for Tuesday, Dec. 27, 2011
• New Releases for Tuesday, Dec. 20, 2011
• New Releases for Tuesday, Dec. 13, 2001
• New Releases for Tuesday, Dec. 6, 2011
• New Releases for Tuesday, Nov. 29, 2011
• The 2011 Holiday Gift Guide: Gifts for the Good, the Bad and Everyone In Between
• New Releases for Tuesday, Nov. 22, 2011
• CBS Renews ‘Survivor’ for two more seasons

More

• Walt TV
• BVB: Blood, Violence & Babes - B-Movie Lover's Holy Grail

Monthly Archives

• February 2012
• January 2012
• December 2011
• November 2011
• October 2011
• September 2011

Land of the Lost

Posted Oct 30, 2009 by John Allman

Updated Oct 30, 2009 at 05:49 AM

Land of the Lost
Genre: TV/Comedy/Science-Fiction
Directed by: Brad Silberling
Run time: 102 minutes
Rating: PG-13
Format: DVD

The Lowdown: Dear Will Ferrell, how it pains me to write this letter to you.

I have loved your films for years, laughed at your comic creations, wept tears born of my juvenile fascination with pee and flatulence jokes and generally worshipped pretty much every movie you’ve made (minus “Semi-Pro,” sorry dude, but it was one sports movie too many) since 2003’s “Old School.”

I have quoted liberally from “Anchorman” and “Talladega Nights,” guffawed at the ridiculousness of “Step Brothers” and even marveled at minor cameos in “Wedding Crashers” and other films where you seemingly appeared like a comedy angel to elevate a lesser film to greater glory.

But “Land of the Lost”?

I couldn’t believe the reviews, refused to dignify the lack of stars, scoffed at the box office bomb that was opening weekend.

I knew everyone had it wrong. I knew there was that same Will Ferrell spark to be found. I waited eagerly to gloat to the detractors at how wrong they were.

Then I actually sat down and watched it. And man, oh man, does it suck.

I realize you had the unenviable task of taking a low-budget show about nothing, really, and making it into a subversive comedy about something.

But wow – did you miss the mark.

“Land of the Lost” careens like a drunken pirate at Gasparilla stumbling down Bayshore Boulevard, switching tone wildly and often from family-friendly comedy to adults-only bathroom humor.

It’s like no one knew what to do with the script and opted instead for an anything-goes bravado that falls flat way too often when you consider Ferrell and Danny McBride are two of the funniest men on the planet.

It’s time to regroup, Will Ferrell, and put this atrocity behind you.

Consider this your “Ishtar” or “Hudson Hawk” and just move on.

I forgive you. And I know your legions of fans forgive you as well.

Just take your time, fully develop a new character like Ron Burgundy or Ricky Bobby and come out swinging.

Then this “Land” will thankfully, hopefully be lost from memory for good.

The Stuff You Care About:
Hot chicks – Anna Friel, a grown-up hottie Holly.
Nudity – No.
Gore – No.
Drug use – No.
Bad Guys/Killers – Sleestaks.
Buy/Rent – Neither.
On the Web – http://www.landofthelost.net/
Release Date – Oct. 13, 2009